Friend-zone 101: How to Avoid the Shippers

Most of the time, we focus on how to give two characters romantic chemistry so that the readers will latch onto them and route for them to get together. But that isn’t always the case. There are a number of reasons why you wouldn’t want the readers to ship two characters. Maybe you want them to route for someone else, maybe said character is a bad guy, maybe they are long lost siblings and you don’t want to recreate a Star Wars moment. Or maybe you just want to focus on platonic relationships rather than romantic ones. Whatever the case may be, today we’re talking about how to keep your characters in the friendzone. 

First, establish the mood EARLY on. We’re talking about the first opportunity you can get. Remember in previous blogs we talked about how your protagonist sees other characters affect their description? Make their initial description reflected on how they would describe a friend. If they are attractive, make that not the focus of the paragraph. Or, even better, use phrases like, “Others would say they were attractive but..” you get the point. If they aren’t appealing to the main character or character in interest here, the readers will not consider them a romantic interest. 

Also, there are more ways than just physical description to show a lack of romantic interest. Write what the character’s thoughts are in relation to how you want the reader to view them. For example, “I felt at east. Almost like I was in the presence of an old friend or sibling.” These simple little phrases set the tone for reader expectations and you do not want to have a reader view them as a romantic interest only to be disappointed later on (this is not the case in a love triangle. In that example, you do want the character of interest to view the character in a romantic light.) 

Second, make the characters' moments in close proximity friendly. Love interests tend to be written with shy moments in close proximity or lingering on physical touches. Characters can have plenty of platonic moments with physical touches but are not written with the same feeling. Platonic touches are often more of comfort, safety, ease, and most often aren’t lingered on. Unless the story’s theme calls for it, try to keep your platonic physical touches either brief or little inner monologue, revolving around the emotions of the scene and not the touching. 

When we are with friends and family, we don’t think twice about hugs, cheek kisses if that’s your thing, or even something like holding hands. In a romantic relationship, we think about the feel of their hand or the look in their eyes as these are occurring. Keep that in mind when writing scenes between two platonic characters.  

Third, establish the true romantic interest. You may have your reasons for not wanting to directly reveal the romantic interest, but if you’re not trying to setup a love triangle and the reader gets to see the main character connect with another character knowing there will be romantic developments with someone, it could cause your reader a lot of confusion. Most of the time, readers like to know who to root for so making it clear who is the romantic lead and who is the friend is very welcome. 

You should never purposefully exclude physical touch or description solely in fear that some readers may accidentally ship your platonic characters, but being mindful of how your words will be interpreted will save you and your readers from being misinterpreted. Not all stories need romantic interest but platonic relationships are almost always necessary. 

Because really, it’s all about the friends we make along the way…

I’ll see myself out. Until next time. Write-on!